Why First-Gen Mental Health Is Unique — and Why You’re Not Broken
Being the first in your family to attend college, pursue a professional career, or navigate parenting with emotional awareness is a powerful achievement—and often a lonely one. If you're a first-generation adult, you may feel caught between cultures, roles, and expectations. You may carry pride and pressure in equal measure. This emotional complexity is what makes first-gen mental health both unique and often misunderstood.
What Is a First-Gen Adult?
A "first-generation adult" typically refers to someone who is the first in their family to grow up or come of age in a new country, or the first to access significant milestones such as higher education, professional careers, or therapy. Many first-gen individuals are the U.S.-born children of immigrants, or the first in their family to graduate college, enter white-collar professions, or engage in mental health support. This role often comes with high expectations, uncharted territory, and deep emotional layers.
As a first-gen Latina and psychologist, I see how deeply this duality shapes emotional wellbeing. Many of us were raised in households where emotional awareness wasn’t always accessible—not because our families didn’t care, but because they were navigating economic hardship, cultural displacement, and structural barriers. In these environments, survival often required focus on practical needs rather than emotional reflection. Gratitude was expected. Struggle was normalized. Seeking help was sometimes stigmatized.
The Beauty and Difficulty of Being Bicultural
Living between two cultures is both enriching and disorienting. Gloria Anzaldúa's concept of the "Borderlands" speaks to this experience—the psychological and emotional space where multiple identities intersect, clash, and evolve. First-gen individuals often live in this in-between: translating one world while trying to thrive in another.
You may feel too much or not enough for either culture. You might speak fluent English and still carry shame for not speaking your family's native language fluently. You may feel the need to excel in professional settings while holding onto cultural values of humility, collectivism, and caretaking.
There is beauty in this adaptability AND it comes with grief. Grief for what your parents couldn’t teach you about college applications, financial aid, or setting boundaries. Grief for the parts of yourself that had to grow up too quickly just to make it.
The Strengths of Being First-Gen
Let’s begin by honoring your strengths. First-gen individuals are:
Resourceful: You've learned to navigate systems your family may not have had access to.
Resilient: You've carried emotional and logistical burdens with little support.
Responsible: You've often taken on adult roles early in life—translating, caregiving, advocating.
Deeply Connected to Family: Even when boundaries are hard, you value your roots.
These traits are incredible and they often come with invisible costs.
The Emotional Weight You Carry
Being "the first" often means:
Feeling guilt for having opportunities your family didn’t
Struggling with boundaries and code-switching between home and professional environments
Minimizing your needs because you were taught not to complain
Suppressing emotions that don’t feel "productive" or "grateful"
This can lead to anxiety, burnout, identity confusion, and a persistent sense that you are "too much" or "not enough."
You're Not Broken—You're Carrying Too Much
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, or disconnected, it doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means you’re human.
Therapy can be a space where you stop performing strength and start exploring what it means to be held. You don’t have to shrink to honor your family. You don’t have to abandon your values to heal. In fact, culturally responsive therapy integrates your identity and your healing.
You are not broken. You are breaking new ground. And that deserves care.
🗓️ Ready to Start Therapy?
If you live in New York and are looking for a culturally responsive therapist who understands the complexities of first-gen identity, I invite you to schedule a free 15-minute consultation. Let’s explore how therapy can support your healing, growth, and legacy.
👉 Schedule a Consultation: Email me at ashleyrodriguezphd@gmail.com
