When Parenting Feels Triggering: It’s Not a Setback — It’s a Sign You’re Healing

Sometimes, your child’s crying wakes up the parts of you that were never comforted.

If you’ve ever felt unexpectedly overwhelmed while parenting — by sadness, frustration, shame, or even a sense of numbness — you’re not alone.

Maybe a meltdown leaves you spiraling with guilt.
Maybe setting a boundary makes your chest tighten.
Maybe a small moment cracks something wide open inside.

These reactions aren’t just about the moment itself.
They’re often echoes from the past — tied to the parts of you that weren’t seen, soothed, or supported when you were growing up.

This doesn’t mean you’re broken.
It means you’re healing. And noticing these moments is a powerful form of awareness.

Ghosts & Angels in the Nursery

There’s a concept in psychology called “Ghosts and Angels in the Nursery.”

• Ghosts are the memories, patterns, and emotional imprints from your own childhood — especially the ones that resurface in high-stress parenting moments.

• Angels are the moments of grace, support, or intuition — whether from your past or from within — that guide you toward doing things differently.

When you’re raising a child while also tending to your own emotional wounds, the past and present can blur.
And sometimes, that can feel like too much.

But the truth is — this isn’t a sign of failure. It’s a sign of transformation.

You’re not just parenting.
You’re reclaiming.
You’re reconnecting — with your child and with yourself.
You’re becoming someone more aware, more present, and more rooted.

Start Where You Are

If any of this feels familiar, I want to acknowledge your courage.
Noticing these patterns — and naming them — is not easy work. It requires strength, honesty, and care.

It’s okay if it feels tender.
It’s okay if it brings up grief.
You’re already doing something brave by being aware.

Therapy Can Support This Process

If you’re a parent or caregiver living in New York, and this post resonates with your experience, you don’t have to navigate this alone.

As a licensed psychologist with expertise in perinatal mental health and intergenerational trauma, I offer a compassionate, culturally responsive space to explore the emotional layers of parenting and healing.

✨ Let’s connect in a free 15-minute consultation to see if therapy might be a good fit.Email me at ashleyrodriguezphd@gmail.com

You deserve care that honors your story — not just as a parent, but as a whole person.

You're not failing.
You're becoming.
And that is sacred work.